Teacher: “How do you spell “dog”?”
Boy: “D, o, g, enter.”
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During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him.
Teacher asks, "Johnny, join these two sentences together.
I was cycling to school.
I saw a dead body."
Little Johnny after thinking for a while says, "I saw a dead body cycling to school."
Vote:
Q: What do you get when you mix English class with alcohol?
A: Tequila Mockingbird
In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with "t".
Pupil: Today and Tomorrow.
She is so blonde, she studied for a blood test.
How many students does it take to change a light bulb?
"Is it worth any bonus marks?"
Q. To a blonde, what is long and hard?
A. Grade 4.
Why do mexicans walk around the school like they own the place?
Cause there dad built it and there mom cleans it at night.
The headmistress at a girls' prep school in the old South (circa 1959) calls down to the army base and speaks with one of the officers:
"We're having a social here at school and I was wondering if you could send some of your nice young men to attend."
"Why of course," the Lieutenant answers.
"Just one thing," says the lady. "Of course you'll make sure there aren't any Jews there."
"Why of course," the Lieutenant answers.
On the day of the dance, a bus pulls up from the base.
Out comes a platoon of black GIs.
The schoolmistress is quite distressed.
"Why, why, there must be some mistake," she says to a burly black Master Sergeant.
"Why heck no, ma'am," he replies. "Lt. Goldberg NEVER makes a mistake!"