What fur do we get from a tiger?
As fur as possible!
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What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elkaseltzer.
One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE."
It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York.
So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him.
When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE."
The policeman arrested her on the spot.
Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail?
Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
What's the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper !
How do you go about hiring a horse?
Try two pairs of stilts!
One afternoon I was walking on a trail with my baby daughter, chatting to her about the scenery.
When a man and his dog approached, I leaned down to the carriage and said, “See the doggy?”
Suddenly I felt foolish talking to my baby as if she understood me.
However, just as the man passed, he reached down, patted his dog, and said, “See the baby?”
How do you get a hundred cows in a barn?
You hang up a bingo sign!
What's gray and powdery?
Instant Elephant.
Q: What do the mosquito parents say to their small children, when they see people lying on the sandy beach during a hot summer day more than 15 minutes?
A: "Kids, prepare the cutlery and your chin-straps.
Our lunch is already heated up and ready for the consumption!"