What did the slug say as he slipped down the window very fast?
How slime flies.
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Teacher: Students, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Class: "Brotherly love."
Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.
He came across two men.
One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.
How did the rabbit become a wrestling champion?
It had a lot of hare pins.
What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman?
When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
How far can a rabbit run into the woods?
Halfway.
After that she's running out of the woods.
How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented?
They were very impressed.
Q: Why did the ants dance on the jam jar?
A: The lid said, "Twist to open."