Joke #2999

What color is a burp? It's burple!
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Yo momma so ugly that she made all her blind kids cry.
Vote: has 41.91 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, Yo mama
A lawyer, a priest, and a young boy were in a plane that was going to crash, yet they only had 2 parachutes. The lawyer proclaimed that since he was the smartest man on the plane, that he deserved to survive. He took a chute and jumped. The priest looks and the young boy, and reflecting back on his life, told the young boy to take the last parachute since he had already lived a wonderful and full life. The boy replied, "You can have the other chute because the smartest man on this plane just jumped out with my bookbag!"
Vote: has 83.58 % from 170 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, lawyer, priest
Yo mama so nasty that when she goes to the universal studios children follow her shouting "Shrek! Shrek!"
Vote: has 72.81 % from 220 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, kids, Yo mama
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat". The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as. "I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: accountant, Halloween, kids, mean, men
Q:How does a bear start a race? A: READY, TEDDY, GO!
Vote: has 28.62 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
Little Johnny and Mary were standing at the beach in their bathing suits. Johnny says to Mary, hey you show me yours and I'll show you mine. Mary says ok, and drops her bathing suit the same time as Johnie. He look and gasps you don't got one of these, but Mary laughs and says Yea, but with one of these I can get as many of those I want.
Vote: has 74.73 % from 52 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, little Johnny
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a police man approached him and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the boy replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business." Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The boy replied, "Why, yes."
Vote: has 68.56 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

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Should women have children after 35? "No, 35 children are enough!"
Vote: has 65.35 % from 397 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, kids, women
What did the black kid get for Christmas? YOUR BIKE!
Vote: has 66.57 % from 197 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, Christmas, kids, racist