Joke #3050

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A: We have to stick together.
Vote:
has 55.13 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: kids

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

My great grandson's class were asked to make a mothers day card for their mothers. On mothers day he presented this beautiful hand made a card to his mum... Hearts and kisses and wishing her Happy Mums Day on opening the card printed in bold letters was "DADS THE BEST"... Needless to say, his mum still loves him.
Vote:
has 58.77 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: family, kids, love, mean
When Chuck Norris was a kid he taught his parents to stay away from strangers.
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. “Throw out more!” shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. “More!” he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control. He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who’s crying. They ask him why he’s crying and he says “A pistol hit me on the head!” They drive more and meet another boy who’s crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, “A rifle hit me on the head!” They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who’s laughing hysterically. They ask him, “Kid, what’s so funny?” The boy replies, “I sneezed and a house blew up!”
Vote:
has 81.42 % from 467 votes. More jokes about: kids, military
"Excuse me," he says to her, "do we know each other?" "Sure," she answers, "one of my children is yours!" The guy confused, thinks and suddenly remembers the only time he cheated his wife. So he asks her: "Were you that stripper invited at a bachelor party at the suburbs last spring and we ended up having wild sex in the kitchen? You had manacled my hands and you cramed a carrot in my a…!" The woman frowned answers: "No, I am your son’s philologist..."
Vote:
has 74.01 % from 239 votes. More jokes about: food, kids, sex, wife
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
Vote:
has 63.51 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: kids
My wife beamed at me with pride and said, "Wow! I never thought our son would go that far!" I said, "This trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter."
Vote:
has 54.46 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids, wife
You know when donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That's what it's like having kids.
Vote:
has 58.42 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids
When I was born, everyone was so happy. Even the doctor said, ‘I think it’s a baby.’
Vote:
has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: kids
Willy: "Mom, are our neighbors very poor people? Mother: "I don't think so, Willy. Why do you ask?" Willy: "Because they made such a fuss when their baby swallowed a coin."
Vote:
has 55.11 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: baby, kids, money
Once upon a time there was a women that was about to have triplets. In her stomach the babies were talking to each other. The first baby says "I want to be a plumber, because there is so much water in here". The second baby says "I want to be an electrician because it is so dark in here". And the last baby says "I want to be a hunter, because if that damn snake comes back in here i'm going to cut it off".
Vote:
has 78.68 % from 817 votes. More jokes about: kids, sex, women