Joke #3265

How can you tell the difference between men's real gifts and their guilt gifts? Guilt gifts are nicer.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: men

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A man goes to his doctor and says, “I don’t think my wife’s hearing isn’t as good as it used to be. What should I do?” The doctor replies, “Try this test to find out for sure. When your wife is in the kitchen doing dishes, stand fifteen feet behind her and ask her a question, if she doesn’t respond keep moving closer asking the question until she hears you.” The man goes home and sees his wife preparing dinner. He stands fifteen feet behind her and says, “What’s for dinner, honey? He gets no response, so he moves to ten feet behind her and asks again. Still no response, so he moves to five feet. Still, no answer. Finally he stands directly behind her and says, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” She replies, “For the fourth time, I SAID CHICKEN!”
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has 79.71 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: doctor, food, men, wife
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera? Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men
A man goes into a florist and says, "I want to buy some flowers for my girlfriend". "Certainly sir", she responds, "and what in particular are you after"? After some thought, the man answers, "a shag".
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has 80.05 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, men, relationship, sex
John it’s alright muttering a few words in the church and finding yourself married, but if you mutter a few words in your sleep you might find yourself divorced.
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has 18.64 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: men
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: men
Why don't men have mid-life crises? They stay stuck in adolescence.
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has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: men
Women prefer the simple things in life… like men.
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has 79.91 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: life, men, women
Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.
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has 38.99 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: fart, men
I stopped at a friend's house the other day and found him stalking around with a fly-swatter. When I asked if he was getting any flies, he answered: "Yeah, three males and two females." Curious, I asked how he could tell the difference. He said: "Three were on a beer can and two were on the phone."
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has 79.54 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: Why was the blonde girl's belly button bruised? A: Because blonde men are dumb too.
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has 70.34 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: blonde, men, sex, stupid, women