Joke #3362

Bigamy is having one husband too many. Some say monogamy is the same.
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has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men

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They put one man on the moon. Why can’t they put them all there?
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What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women? Exchange him.
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In the beginning, God created Earth and then rested. After that, He creaed man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man got ever rested.
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Husband: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? Wife: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
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In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.
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has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: communication, men, political, women
Being a man definitely has its perks... 1. Your backside is never a factor in a job interview. 2. Your orgasms are real. Always. 3. Your last name stays put. 4. The garage is all yours. 5. Wedding plans take care of themselves. 6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from having an elicit affair. 7. Car mechanics tell you the truth. 8. You don't give a hoot if no one notices your new haircut. 9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area. 10. Same work .. more pay. 11. Wrinkles-add character. 12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments. 13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100. 14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen. 15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them. 16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. 17. One mood, ALL the time. 18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds. 19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase. 20. You can open all your own jars. 21.You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. 22. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack. 23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices. 24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat. 25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. 26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me." 27. No maxi-pads. 28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends. 29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors. 30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. 31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes. 32. The same hair style lasts for years, maybe decades. 33. Your belly usually hides your big hips. 34. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons. 35. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. 36. Christmas shopping can be done for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 15 minutes. 37. The world is your urinal.
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has 80.62 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: life, men
What's the difference between a man and a messy room? You can straighten up a messy room.
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: men
Susan was having a tough day and after returning home she started complaining. She said to her husband, "Nobody loves me….nobody cares for me..the whole world hates me!" Her husband, watching TV said casually: "That’s not true dear. You are not that famous that whole world hates you. Some people don’t even know you."
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has 74.87 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: husband, love, men
An exhausted hunter out in the woods stumbled across another hunter. Hunter 1: "Am I glad to see you, I've been lost for three days." Hunter 2: "Don't get too excited, friend, I've been lost for three weeks."
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: hunting, men
Q: Why shouldn't Men using iron supplements take Viagra? A: It may cause them to spin around and point north.
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, viagra