Joke #3437

Q: Why did the man put condoms on his ears during sex? A: He didn't want to get hearing aids.
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has 57.23 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fat, men, Yo mama
A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed. At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwing the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow. Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead. The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: "You deserved it, you horny bastard!" And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land."
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has 84.92 % from 757 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Rudolph the well hung reindeer, Had a great enormous cock, All he could ever do with it, was beat it off inside a sock, All of the female reindeer, Had pussies that were just too small, Poor old well hung Rudolph, Could not get any sex at all, Then one horny Christmas eve, Santa came to say, "Rudolph with your cock so strong... Fuck my arsehole all night long!" Then all the reindeer loved him, A few of them were heard to say, "Rudolph the well hung reindeer... You're so lucky Santa's gay"
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has 69.12 % from 214 votes. More jokes about: animal, Christmas, dirty, gay, sex
A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's steering wheel stuck to the front of his pants. The bartender asks, "Hey, doesn't that hurt?" The pirate growls, "Aye, it's drivin' me nuts."
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has 67.39 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, pirate
A man was shaving in the bathroom when all of a sudden bubba, the boy he payed to mow his lawn comes in to take a piss. Well, the man cant help but look over his shoulder and he is surprised, "bubba, whats your secret?" Bubba says"well, every night before i go to get in bed with a woman i whack my dick on the bedpost three times." So the man decides to try it that very night. So he got to bed and whacked his dick on the bedpost three times and the wife wakes up and says"bubba, is that you?"
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has 84.67 % from 947 votes. More jokes about: dirty, wife, women
Q: Why would a blonde wear green lipstick? A: Because red means Stop.
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has 75.25 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, communication, dirty, sex
A Saudi prince recently requested that naked statues be covered up while visiting Rome. Apparently his 9 year old wife found them offensive.
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has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, religious, wife
There are a hundred holes in the body of a woman; one of them would be filled with a penis and 99 others could be filled with money.
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has 62.79 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, money, sex, women
Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it.
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex
Babe when I die I want you to cremate me, pour my ashes into a bowl of chili, and eat me just so I can tear that ass up one more time!
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has 58.94 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty