Where do you go if you become ‘at one’ with your computer? Nerdvana.
Where's the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google.
Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and restart. Order shall return.
Why did the lumberjack get nowhere with the internet? He kept logging on and off.
An engineer, a manager and a programmer are driving down a steep mountain road. The brakes fail and the car careens down the road until it hits a tree. They all get out and discuss how to fix the car. The manager says, ‘To fix this problem we need to organise a committee and develop a mission statement.’ The engineer says, ‘That would take too long. I have my penknife here. I’ll take apart the brake system, isolate the problem, and correct it.’ The programmer says, ‘No, I think we should push the car back up the road and see if it happens again.’
Q: What do you call a computer expert? A: A control-alt-elite.
What goes ‘choo choo choo’ while online? Thomas the search engine.
Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.
What did one computer say to the other? 010101101010101010101
When Chuck Norris surfs the Internet, he actually surfs on a virtual wave of 1's and 0's.
The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"