Joke #3797

It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
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has 71.63 % from 226 votes. More jokes about: sex

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Steve and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn't go this time because his wife wouldn't let him. After a lot of teasing and name calling, Steve headed home frustrated. The following week when Steve's buddies arrived at the lake to set up camp, they were shocked to see Steve. He was already sitting at the campground with a cold beer, swag rolled out, fishing rod in hand, and a camp fire glowing. "How did you talk your missus into letting you go Steve?" "I didn't have to," Steve replied. "Yesterday, when I left work, I went home and slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows because I couldn't go fishing. Then the ol' lady Snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise'. When I peeled her hands back, she was standing there in a beautiful see through negligee and she said, 'Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want,' So, Here I am!"
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has 84.99 % from 1560 votes. More jokes about: beer, dirty, fish, sex, wife
A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter" The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?" The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
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has 36.53 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: age, black humor, doctor, sex
A man died and went to hell and was sitting on a stone looking very depressed. Another demon came up to him and asked: "Why the glum look, man?" The man replied: "Well I just died and now I'm in hell." But the demon just smiled and said: "Don't feel bad, it's not a bad thing at all. Do you like smoking?" the demon asked. The man's face lit up and he answered; "Yeah!" "Well on Mondays we all get together and smoke till we die. The best thing is, we're already dead!" the demon answered. "Alright!" creid the man. "Do you like drinking?" the demon asked. "Yeah!" The man answered. "Well on Wednesdays we all get together and drink till we die. The best thing is, we're already dead!" the demon answered. "Sweet!" cried the man. "Are you gay?" asked the demon. The man frowned and said: "No." The demon replied: "Oh, then you're gonna hate Saturdays..."
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has 75.40 % from 244 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, death, sex
A husband feeling a bit horny goes to the bathroom and returns with 4 aspirin and a glass of water for his wife. He says, "Here honey, here are some aspirin and a some water." She replied, "but honey I do not have a headache!" He replied, "Thank God!"
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has 58.67 % from 202 votes. More jokes about: sex
A girlfriend said to me during sex that I should be a little more graceful, so I went to ballet classes!
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has 59.20 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: communication, relationship, sex
Boy: What's it called when 3 people have sex? Girl: A threesome Boy: What's it called when two people have sex? Girl: A twosome Boy: Now you know why they call me handsome
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has 78.68 % from 502 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" Woman: "Unfertilized."
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has 66.68 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: food, men, sex, women
Q: Why do black women lose their hair at an early age? A: From all of the hair pulling during rape.
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has 17.57 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: age, black people, dirty, sex, women
What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man.
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has 51.39 % from 290 votes. More jokes about: men, sex
My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: "What are you doing?" Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
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has 57.18 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex