Joke #3496

A husband feeling a bit horny goes to the bathroom and returns with 4 aspirin and a glass of water for his wife. He says, "Here honey, here are some aspirin and a some water." She replied, "but honey I do not have a headache!" He replied, "Thank God!"

Q: Why do rednecks like having sex doggie style? A: That way they can both watch wrestling.

An evening of Valentine's Day. A man comes to a drug store: "Good evening!" "Sorry, we are sold out..."

Johny is the first day in jail in the cell with one mighty and a crazy prisoner and this crazy prisoner tells Johny: "You probably do not know that on the first day must every new prisoner must pass over the so-called welcome´s ceremonial. Ok, so I ask you directly. Do you want it with cream or without the cream?" Johny says: "I want it with creme, of course." The crazy prisoner yells and says: "Cremo, come here, please."

Yo mama's so fat when she is having sex, her partner doesen't know if it's in her butt or her boobs.

What is the smallest hotel in the world? A p***y - because you gotta leave your bags outside!

The vicar never entertained lewd thoughts – they always entertained him.

I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn and it really worked. I’m really beginning to fancy those rhinos now.

What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k? A joystick does its job.

Q: What does the receptionist at the sperm clinic say when clients are leaving? A: “Thanks for coming!”

An old man goes to his doctor and says, ‘Can you give me something to lower my sex drive.’ The doctor replies, ‘I would have thought at your age it’s all in the mind,’ ‘It is,’ agrees the old man. ‘That’s why I want it lower.’