Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
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The results of in-depth studies have determined that the most often used sexual position for marriedcouples is the "doggie position".
The husband sits up and begs and the wife rolls over and plays dead.
I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
How can you tell if a blonde is having a bad day?
Her tampon is behind her ear and she can’t find her pencil.
Woman to doctor: ‘Doctor, every time I sneeze I have an orgasm.’
Doctor: ‘And what are you taking for it?’ Woman: ‘Pepper.’
"Is it rape if it's your wife?"
"I don't think so."
"What a relief!
I thought you'd be mad as hell!"
Two girlfriends meet again after a few years.
One is pushing around a baby buggy.
The first girlfriend looks at the baby and is perplexed.
"Black skin? Blue slit eyes? A blonde afro? How did you do that?"
Murmurs the other woman.
"Damn gangbang! At least he doesn't bark!"
Two old men hobble into the pub.
One says, ‘I’ve heard Guinness puts lead in your pencil. Shall we try some?’
‘All right,’ says the other.
‘But, to be honest, I’ve got nobody to write to.’
The famous sex therapist was on the radio taking questions when a caller asked, ‘Doctor, why do men always want to marry a virgin?’
To which the doctor responded, ‘To avoid criticism.’
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island.
After one month the woman says:
"I can not proceed in this way."
And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they dig up the woman.
Vote:
Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes.
They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "Ok we can run for it or we can stay here and out number them."
And the other rabbit says, "We're going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother."