Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
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A Yankee from Chicago and a Texan were talking.
The Yankee said, "sex is so easy where I'm from we just walk up and stick it in."
The Texan said, "where I'm from we stick it in and walk up."
‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.’
Les Dawson
Kamasutra says:
If you suck one nipple, the women herself offers the other one.
And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together?
A: In case you miss.
Why do men like having sex with the lights on?
It makes it easier to put a name to the face.
In bed my girlfriend used to mentally dress me.
A teacher was asking his pupils to tell the name of body organs.
When he asked the name of buttocks when pointing the picture of it, one of the pupils answered: "Its name is trouble".
When the teacher asked the boy about the reason, the boy replied: "I myself saw my father last night rubbing my mother's ass saying 'what a trouble it is.'"
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized."
A furniture store keeps calling me.
But all I wanted was one night stand.
A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore.
"Do you have any idea why?"
"Well, I had sex with an elephant!"
"You did?
But elephants are known to have small penises!"
"Yeah, but he fingered me first."