I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called?
The man.
A woman is divorcing her husband on the grounds of cruelty.
His organ is so large it hurts her to have sex.
After she has explained her problem to a lawyer, he tells her that he’ll file her petition.
‘Stuff that!’ says the woman.
‘Why can’t you go round and sandpaper his down a bit.’
Two gay men, Paul and Tom, were making love one night, and had just finished when Paul decided he was going to freshen up in the shower.
Tom was laying there thinking about how wonderful Paul was, when he decided he was going to join him in the shower.
When Tom got into the bathroom, he opened up the shower curtain and the first thing he saw was a large cumshot on the wall.
He wailed to Tom, "I can't believe you! We just finish making love and you come in here and jack-off!"
Paul looks at the wall and says "What are you talkng about? I wasn't jacking-off, I farted!"
I was married to a Gemini she caught me cheating on her with herself.
Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.
Vote:
Q: What's the worst part about sex?
A: When they wake up!
What’s the difference between a bar and a g-spot?
Most men have no trouble finding a bar.
Peter approaches the gates of Heaven.
"Knock knock," says Peter.
Miraculously, someone answers him.
"Who's there," a voice in the distance asked.
"God," says Peter.
"God who," asked the voice?
"GOD DAMMIT open these gates!
I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"
Vote:
An alien walks into a bar and sits next to a drunk guy and begins poking him in the shoulder.
The drunk guy just ignores him.
After a wile the guy turns to the alien and begins looking him up and down.
He notices that the alien has no genitalia.
He then asks "You guys have no genitalia, how do you guy have sex?"
The alien, still poking him in the arm, just smiles!