They presented him with a cup when he was a boxer. It was to keep his teeth in.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it's the only love they get.
Why are old socks good for golf? Because they have eighteen holes.
There was a tragic end to the water polo championships – all the horses drowned.
Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
"Waiter, this vinegar is rather lumpy." Waiter: "That's because they're pickled onions, sir."
Randy Johnson can throw a fastball 101mph. Chuck Norris can throw Randy Johnson 101mph.
"I like to watch the World Series. Here's what I do. I sit down and drink a few beers in my underwear and scream at the TV. That's until they throw me out of Applebees." Dave Letterman
Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?" Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."