They presented him with a cup when he was a boxer.
It was to keep his teeth in.
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Once Chuck Norris swam all the oceans for 7 days and oceans got cold.
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My dad is really annoyed, I had the TV on and he accidentally saw the entire football match – he’d just wanted to watch the results on the news.
Q: Why is horse racing so romantic?
A: Because the horse hugs the rails, the jockey puts his arms around the horse and you can kiss your money goodbye.
My wife said, "I can think of 14 reasons to leave you, plus your obsession with Tennis!"
I replied, "That's 15 love!"
Played a round of golf with the local course pro for some helpful tips.
After playing the first hole I turned to him for some advice and all he said was "loft".
So after the next 4 holes I asked him again and all he said was "loft"
Now we're done with the round and I asked him why after each hole all he would ever tell me was "loft"?
To which the pro relies "loft" - "Lack Of F*cking Talent"
Why are baseball players in trouble with the law so often?
They always hit and run.
Why did the referee have such a high phone bill?
Because he made to many calls!
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers?
In case they get a hole in one!