Joke #3873

He was such an egotist that he joined the navy so the world could see him.
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has 28.82 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: mean, navy

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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
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has 21.56 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, desert island, disgusting, navy
As a member of the organization that installs computer systems aboard Navy ships, I am mindful of how important the off-ship e-mail capabilities are to sailor morale, especially when some vessels are deployed for up to six months. One day while shopping at the base commissary, I noticed another crucial aspect of my job. I was behind a frazzled mother with two active children, and as I watched, she stalked over to where her young son had perched himself on the rail of the freezer case. "If you don't get off there right now," she commanded, "I'm going to e-mail your father!"
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: computer, kids, navy, technology, time
Son: "What are you going to be for Halloween dad?" Me: "Drunk" Son: "What's mom gonna be?" Me: "Mad"
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has 75.62 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: dad, drunk, family, Halloween, mean
A lawyer was asked if he likes to become a Jehovah's Witness. He declined, as he hadn't seen the accident, but replied that he would still be interested in taking the case.
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has 71.35 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: communication, lawyer, mean, money, religious
Mum: "How would you describe me?" Dad: "ABCDEFGHIJK" Mum: "What does that mean?" Dad: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, funny, graceful, helpful, intelligent." Mum: "What about JK?" Dad: "Just Kidding."
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has 83.29 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, women
Q: What explorer was the best at Hiding and Seek? A: Marco Polo.
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has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, game, history, navy
Q: Why does the Iraqi Navy have glass bottom boats? A: So they can see their Air Force.
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has 69.84 % from 161 votes. More jokes about: air force, navy
Q: How long does it take for a workplace bully to come up with a patentable new invention? A: It depends: If the designer's desk drawer is locked, about 5 minutes, otherwise, under a minute.
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has 70.02 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: black humor, mean, time, vulgar, work
One day Adam and his parents were at the mall. Adams mum gave him a $5 note and sent him on his way. He got a bag of chips and a drink. He went outside and his mum and dad weren't there.
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has 45.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: family, food, kids, mean, money
I told my wife that a man is like a fine wine... I always get better with age. The next day, she locked me in the wine cellar.
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has 82.79 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, mean, wife, wine