What are the small bumps around women’s nipples?
It’s Braille for ‘suck here’.
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They say sex is a killer...
Do you want to die happy?
Vote:
Q: What goes in hard and pink, but comes out soft and mushy?
A: Bubblegum and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Two sperms.
The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?"
The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
Vote:
Are you a shark?
Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
How can you tell if a blonde is having a bad day?
Her tampon is behind her ear and she can’t find her pencil.
What is a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
Do you work at a cattery?
Because I wanna be covered in pussy.
One day God came down and said to three guys that the less you cheat on your wives the better the cars you'll get in heaven.
So the first guy went to heaven after cheating on his wife 67 times and he got a Mercedes.
The second guy went to heaven and had cheated on his wife 2 times and he got a Ferrari, then the third guy went to heaven and said that he had never cheated on his wife and he got a Bentley.
Then one day the third guy was all sad and depressed and the first and second guys asked him what was wrong and the third guy said, "I saw my wife the other day" and the first guy said "yeah, so" and the third guy said " she was riding a skateboard."
What´s the difference between a goodyear and a fucking good year? 365 condoms.