Why do men like having sex with the lights on?
It makes it easier to put a name to the face.
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I've accepted every email offer I've ever received.
My penis is now 235 feet long.
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I heard that the missionary position helps men to work out the chest and triceps... do you wanna help me verify this?
A man goes to a psychologist and says, "Doc I got a real problem, I can't stop thinking about relations."
The psychologist says, "Well let's see what we can find out", and pulls out his ink blots.
"What is this a picture of?" he asks.
The man turns the picture upside down then turns it around and states, "That's a man and a woman having relations."
The psychologist says, "Very interesting," and shows the next picture.
"And what is this a picture of?"
The man looks and turns it in different directions and says, "That's a man and a woman having relations."
The psychologists tries again with the third ink blot, and asks the same question, "What is this a picture of?"
The patient again turns it in all directions and replies, "That's a man and a woman having relations."
The psychologist states, "Well, yes, you do seem to be obsessed with relations."
"Me!?" demands the patient.
"You're the one who keeps showing me the dirty pictures!"
A 6 year old boy asks his daddy:
Daddy, where did I come from to this life?
You were brought by a stork.
That's strange, you have such a pretty wife, but nevertheless you're fucking a stork.
Q: Why do rednecks like having sex doggie style?
A: That way they can both watch wrestling.
Dad shouts: "Stop watching porn, I can hear it in my room!"
Son: "Dad.. I'm not watching porn, that is Maria Sharapova playing Tennis!"
How do you make a woman scream twice in the bedroom?
Fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the curtains.
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Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men?
A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
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