Joke #4169

Teacher: To which family does the elephant belong? Pupil: I don’t know, nobody I know owns one!
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Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
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Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
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Teacher:Maria please point to America on the map. Maria:This is it. Teacher:Well done. Now class, who found America? Class:Maria did.
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She is so blonde, she studied for a blood test.
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If you majored in fine arts or philosophy, you have good reason to be worried. The only place you are now really qualified to get a job is in Ancient Greece.
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John: Knock, knock. Justin: Who’s there? John: Gladys. Justin: Gladys, who? John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!
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When you try to change a man, you basically undertake his mother’s role; And she made him eat spinach and study for school...
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Teacher: “How can you prove the earth is round?” Boy: “I can’t. Besides, I never said it was.”
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After twelve years of carrying books to school, you're well prepared for a career in backpacking.
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Malcolm: Miss Wilson can I go to the loo? Miss Wilson: In two minutes Malcolm. Do your alphabet first. Malcolm: Ok Miss Wilson. abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz. Miss Wilson: Very good, Malcolm, but where's the p? Malcolm: Miss, it's running down my leg!
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