Joke #4380

‘Is your baby a boy or a girl?’ ‘Of course. What else could it be?’
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has 39.42 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: kids

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My kid and I were in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. So I put my hand around my kid and told him "Well son, that's because daddy isn't aroused by men."
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Where does a boat go when it is sick? The dock.
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I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child.
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Yo' Mama is so ugly, her imaginary friend played with other kids.
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As a child, I was afreid of ghosts. As I grew up, I realised people are more scary.
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, vulgar
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
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has 74.15 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: kids
When Chuck Norris was a child, he would play with real logs instead of Lincoln logs.
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has 39.94 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, kids
A young teacher explains to her class of third graders that she is a born-again Christian. She asks the class if any of them are born-again Christians too. Not really knowing what it means to be born-again, but wanting to please and impress their teacher, many little hands suddenly shot up into the air. There's just one girl who doesn't raise her hand. So the teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. The girl says, "Because I'm not a Christian." The teacher asks, "So what are you then? " The girl replies, "I'm an atheist." The teacher's a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks the girl why she's an atheist. The girl says, "It's just that my family isn't religious. My Mom's atheist, and my Dad's atheist, so I'm atheist."rnrnThe teacher is now angry. " That's no reason." she says loudly. "What if your Mom was a moron, and your Dad was a moron. What would you be then?" "Then," says the girl, "I'd be a born-again Christian."
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has 63.45 % from 215 votes. More jokes about: atheist, Christmas, kids, religious, teacher
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were having a conversation one fine Sunday evening. One remarked to the other, ‘I got a new hearing device and it works fine?' The second said, ‘oh yes, my grandchildren just love the gifts of my choice.' The third one who noticed the hearing device in the ear of the first one asked, what kind is it?' The one with the brand new hearing device answered ‘about 6 O'clock'. All three of them looked up in the birds in the sky and said, "Birds of the same feather ‘flock' together."
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has 14.74 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, kids, old people, time
How should you treat a baby goat? Like a kid.
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has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, kids