Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
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Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem?
A: Father's Day.
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Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
Which is the most confusing day in America?
Father's day!
80% don't know whom to wish.
Rest 20% are scared someone will come and wish them.
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Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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Q: Why did they make glow in the dark condoms?
A: So gay guys can play star wars.
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.
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A woman was paying for some items in a supermarket - a pint of milk, a packet of bacon, a small bag of rice and a few vegetables.
The man at the checkout said, "I bet you're single, aren't you?"
"Well yes, I am," the woman replied. "How did you know?"
"Because you're really ugly," replied the man.
Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands.
This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man.
This confirms too, that women are always confused and don't know what they want.
Me: "Hey, don't assume I'm dying alone. I might find someone, you don't know."
Waiter: "I asked if you were dining alone."
Me: "Oh, sorry. Yes."
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