Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday.
Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem? A: Father's Day.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
Which is the most confusing day in America? Father's day! 80% don't know whom to wish. Rest 20% are scared someone will come and wish them.
Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message".
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.
'You're beautiful and I love you," I yelled as I stood alone on the cliff, and my echo replied "I just want to be friends."
Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.