Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
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Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem?
A: Father's Day.
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Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
Which is the most confusing day in America?
Father's day!
80% don't know whom to wish.
Rest 20% are scared someone will come and wish them.
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Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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Much like Apple products, I also, am only compatible with myself.
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Dr. Dave had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long.
No matter how much he tried to forget about it he just couldn't.
The guilt was overwhelming.
But every once in a while he would hear in internal, reassuring voice in his head that said: "Dave don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last. Just let It go Dave."
But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality whispering: "Dave... Daaaave... you're a veterinarian you sick bastard!"
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By tradition, fathers wear a red flower on Father's Day, if their father is alive and a white flower if he's dead.
And if they have a nagging wife and a house full of screaming kids, they wear a pink flower - which means they are living but wish they were dead.
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Q: What's the difference between me and a calendar?
A: A calendar has dates.
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.
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