Wife: My hubby & I have, what he calls-Olympic s*x.
Friend: Wow, must be a terrific s*x life?
Wife: Not really. It only happens once in 4 years.
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"Is it rape if it's your wife?"
"I don't think so."
"What a relief!
I thought you'd be mad as hell!"
A man goes to the doctor suffering from premature ejaculation.
"Can you do anything to help me, Doc?" said the man.
"No, but I can give you the address of a woman who has a short attention span" replied the doctor.
A little boy asked his mother:
Mummy, why are you white and I am black?
Don’t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don’t bark.
What's a man's definition of a romantic evening?
Sex.
Q: What is the first symptom of AIDS?
A: A sharp pain in the ass.
Dr. Dave had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long.
No matter how much he tried to forget about it he just couldn't.
The guilt was overwhelming.
But every once in a while he would hear in internal, reassuring voice in his head that said: "Dave don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last. Just let It go Dave."
But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality whispering: "Dave... Daaaave... you're a veterinarian you sick bastard!"
Vote:
Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
Vote:
Q: Why do bunnies have soft sex?
A: They have cotton balls.
How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
When his hand caught fire.