A man went to his lawyer and told him, ‘My neighbour owes me £500 and he won’t pay up.
What should I do?’
‘Do you have any proof he owes you the money?’ asked the lawyer.
‘Nope,’ replied the man.
‘OK, then write him a letter asking him for the £1,000 he owed you,’ said the lawyer.
‘But it’s only £500,’ replied the man.
‘Precisely.
That’s what he will reply and then you’ll have your proof!’
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A: A boss at least pays you for making your life miserable.
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they ENTER your life...
SEARCH your pocket...
SHIFT your balance ...
CONTROL your life...
when you become an old version DELET you from the system
Why did the mobster put his money in the freezer?
He liked cold hard cash!
What’s the best way to stop water coming into your house?
Don’t pay the water bill.
I lost 125 pounds.
It took me a long time, and it cost me a lot of money, but I finally divorced the bitch!
A frightened investor goes to his financial planner and asks if he’s at all worried about the volatility of the markets these days.
The planner replies that he sure does! In fact, he says that he sleeps like a baby.
The frightened investor was amazed!
"Really? Even with all the fluctuations?"
"Yup! I sleep for a couple of hours, and then I wake up and I cry for a couple of hours."
Q: Why did Hitler kill himself?
A: He saw his gas bill.
Q: Why do economists exist?
A: So accountants have someone to laugh at.
Vote:
I bought a lottery ticket.
My son asked me: "Dady if your ticket wins $100,000 what will you do?"
I replied: "A travel to Europe, drink best and most expensive wines, making sex by the most beautiful actress and so on."
He again asked: "If unfortunately, your ticket didn't win what would be your action?"
I angrily gazed him then I told him: "I don't move here, drink some booze and beer; fuck your mother."