Joke #4666

Mortal: What is a million years like to you? God: Like one second. Mortal: What is a million pounds like to you? God: Like one penny. Mortal: Can I have a penny? God: Just a second…
Vote:
has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

‘He’s spending a year dead for tax purposes.’ Douglas Adams
Vote:
has 34.78 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
A small boy goes up to a man in the street and asks him if he’s lost £5. The man checks his pockets and says, ‘Well, yes. I think I have lost a £5 note. Have you found one?’ The boy replies, ‘No. I just wanted to see how many people had lost a £5 note today. You make 72.’
Vote:
has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: money
An FBI agent was interviewing a bank teller after the bank had been robbed 3 times by the same bandit: "Did you notice anything special about the man?" asks the agent. "Yes," replied the teller. "He was better dressed each time."
Vote:
has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: cop, money
I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
Vote:
has 50.45 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: money
Yo' Mama is like a bus: she's big, she stinks, and it's only a dollar to ride.
Vote:
has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money, Yo mama
Little boy says to his father: "Daddy, I heard on the news that cigarettes have become much more expensive. Does it mean that you're going to smoke less from now on?" And father replies: "No, son. I will smoke as much as a have. But, you'll be eating less!"
Vote:
has 60.67 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dad, food, kids, mean, money
What’s the best way to get in touch with your long-lost relatives? Win the Lottery.
Vote:
has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
A Lalu brought a simple, spendthrift wife from a small town in Bihar. He convinced her that they should go for Honeymoon. The wife would not understand complex term as honeymoon and kept asking for explanation. Lalu said, "Let me feel you my manhood in Honeymoon and you would know." They went. Had lots of fun and came back. Wife back at home asked, "I still don’t understand what is this honeymoon that we went for." The Husband said, "Oh, we were together, had so many hugs, kisses, varieties of sex, jokes, fun all that is honeymoon." The spendthrift wife got angry, "You should have told me that before. Back in town, Malu, Kalu, Suru and I were together all the times, and had this fun without spending a dime of my money."
Vote:
has 50.96 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: holiday, marriage, money, sex, wife
I married my wife for her money. And believe me, I’ve earned it.
Vote:
has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: money
Q: How is a boss better than a wife? A: A boss at least pays you for making your life miserable.
Vote:
has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: life, management, money, wife