Joke #4738

Is everything expensive or I'm just poor?
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: money

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I can't see the point of going to a lap-dancing club. If I wanted a woman who would take my money and sexually frustrate me, I would get married.
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has 81.59 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: marriage, mean, money, sex, women
A gay American was caught by his Filipino gay husband cheating. The American husband asked, "how did you find out?" The Filipino husband replied, "through my Western Union Receipts."
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has 47.36 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: gay, geography, marriage, money
Q: How many corporate attorneys does it take to change a light bulb? A: Who knows, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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has 74.14 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: business, lawyer, light bulb, money
The psychiatrist asks his patient: "Do you really think that you are a horse?" The patient: "Yes." The Doctor: "Ok, it will be a long and expensive therapy." The patient: "It's ok, I have enough money." Doctor: "And how it is possible?" The patient: "Because I have won three times horse races."
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: doctor, horse, money
A pick pocket was up in court for a series of petty crimes. The judge said "Mr. Banks you are hereby fined $100." The lawyer stood up and said "Thanks, my lord, however my client only has $75 on him at this time, but if you'd allow him a few minutes in the crowd. . ."
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has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: lawyer, money
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" Johnny grins and says, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I've made $20!"
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has 85.93 % from 4090 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, money, stupid
As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex, the husband put his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night, while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the bank to the floor where it smashed. To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there were handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife what's up. "Well," she replied, "not everyone is as cheap as you are."
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has 73.40 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: money
The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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has 38.55 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, money
A man walked into a branch of the Antelope Valley Bank and handed a teller a note demanding money. The man had one hand in his pocket, as if holding a gun, so the teller began handing over the contents of her cash drawer. When she had forked over $7,000 the robber said, "That's enough" and walked out the door. It's hard to find a bank robber who knows when he's had enough.
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has 19.23 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: money
Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?" One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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has 82.12 % from 953 votes. More jokes about: age, money, school, teacher