Joke #4751

A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a bitch on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"
Vote:
has 85.08 % from 172 votes. More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What do you call a cow who works for a gardener? A lawn moo-er.
Vote:
has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, work
What is a chameleon's motto? A change is as good as a rest.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Vote:
has 45.39 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Will I ever be able to race my horse again the owner asked the vet. The vet replied, "You certainly will, and you ll probably beat her too!"
Vote:
has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor
Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
Vote:
has 74.05 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: accountant, animal, kids, tax
Q:Where do you find giant snails? A:On the ends of their fingers.
Vote:
has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal
Did you hear about the new shark food restaurant called Jaws? It costs an arm and a leg to eat there.
Vote:
has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Q: What is a duck's favorite TV show? A: The feather forecast!
Vote:
has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, duck
What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster? A cock that stays up all night.
Vote:
has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet? It lives on ice.
Vote:
has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal