What's an octopuses favourite latin saying?
Squid pro quo.
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A penguin's car breaks down and he has it towed to a repair shop.
The mechanic tells him that he should have some information in about an hour.
The penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street so he wanders over while the mechanic works.
He finds the vanilla is the best ice cream he's ever eaten and he eats it with messy and gluttonous abandon getting it all over his face.
He goes back to the mechanic's to check on his car.
The mechanic informs him, "It looks as though you've blown a seal."
"Oh, no." replies the penguin "It's just some ice cream."
A stallion and a mare where due to get married, but the stallion didn't show up at the church.
He got colt feet.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
Why don't sharks eat niggers?
They think it's whale shit.
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Q: Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
A: Because then the children have to play inside.
Q: What will a giraffe do, if you spit in its face?
A: It will kick off your ladder…
Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart?
A: "Cheap, cheap!"
That tornado damage your cow barn any?
Dunno.
Haven't found the durn thing yet.
Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll.