What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians?
One hundred people who don't do dick.
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Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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"For love on the first sight, there's a tremendous medicine!"
"What medicine?"
"To get another look...!"
A man goes into a library and asks where he can find books on suicide.
‘First row on the left,’ replied the librarian.
The man replies, ‘But I’ve already looked in that section.
It’s empty.’
‘I’m not surprised,’ says the librarian.
‘They don’t often bring them back.'
I can teach you how to handle a cucumber.
Q: Why do nursing homes give Viagra to the old men every night?
A: It keeps them from rolling out of bed!
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Girl: I get horny everytime I hear something sexual, it's weird I know, but anyway, what's your name?
Me: Sir BJ Anal The 69th.
Dad: Hey son, if you keep masturbating your going to go blind.
Son: Dad im over here.
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Q: What do a penis and a Rubik's Cubes have in common?
A: The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
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