Joke #4956

An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. "Shit!" says the ant. "One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!"
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him. When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE." The policeman arrested her on the spot.
Vote: has 36.90 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat, cop, women
Teacher: "Who can tell me 5 wild animals?" Little Johnny: "2 lions & 3 wolves."
Vote: has 81.22 % from 104 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, kids, little Johnny, teacher
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. After the man finished his drink, he asked the bartender, "If I show you an even better trick, will you give me free drinks for the rest of the evening?" The bartender agrees, thinking that no trick could possibly be better than the first. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. The man reaches into another pocket and pulls out a small bullfrog, who begins to sing along with the rat's music. While the man is enjoying his beverages, a stranger confronts him and offers him $100,000.00 for the bullfrog. "Sorry," the man replies, "he's not for sale." The stranger increases the offer to $250,000.00 cash up front. "No," he insists, "he's not for sale." The stranger again increases the offer, this time to $500,000.00 cash. The man finally agrees, and turns the frog over to the stranger in exchange for the money. "Are you insane?" the bartender demanded. "That frog could have been worth millions to you, and you let him go for a mere $500,000!" "Don't worry about it." the man answered. "The frog was really nothing special. You see, the rat's a ventriloquist."
Vote: has 81.56 % from 370 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, music
A big city doctor visits an Indian tribe full of men, he asks "How do you guys relieve your sexual tension?" "Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and we'll show you." The next day the doctor shows up and sees a group of men near a donkey. One man says "Since you're our guest you get to go first." The doctor not wanting to go against custom starts to kiss, then proceeds to have sex with the donkey. Then a man in the group asks "Are you almost done Doc?" "We need the donkey to cross the river in order to get to the tribe of women."
Vote: has 80.48 % from 1849 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dirty, doctor, sex, women
No chicken dies a virgin. They get laid at birth *slaps knee*.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, death
Yo' Mama is so fat, she tried to eat her chicken pox.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, fat, food, Yo mama
Who do you think would win in a fight? Godzilla or King Kong Neither, Chuck Norris doesn't let his pets fight!
Vote: has 81.76 % from 344 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Q: What is a black cat's favorite color? A: Purrrrrr-ple!
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
Vote: has 33.88 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, disgusting, fart, women
Why can't Miss Piggy count to 100? Because when she gets to 69 she has a frog in her throat.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal