Why don't blondes eat bananas? They can't find the zipper.
Chuck Norris stuffs lockers into bullies!
Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation. They get drunk and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning – though none of them can remember what they did the night before. The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, “I just graduated from Trinity Bible College and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent.” They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her. The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words. “I just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent.” They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and release her. The last one, a blonde, is strapped in and says, “Well, I’m from the University of Texas and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I’ll tell ya right now, ya’ll ain’t gonna electrocute nobody if you don’t plug this thing in.”
Why did the Blonde pee in the Grocery Store? The sign said "Wet Floor."
One day a blonde went to a sea food restaurant and saw the tank where they kept the lobsters. She took pity on these creatures and hid them in her purse. Later she went to the woods to set the poor animals free.
What’s the difference between a blonde and the Titanic? They know how many men went down on the Titanic.
Q. A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. A. "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Q. Why did the dum blond keep failing her driver's test? A. Because every time the door opened, she jumped into the back seat.
What did the blonde get on her IQ test? Saliva.
What goes stop, go, stop, go, stop, go? A blonde at a flashing red light!
A blonde goes to the hospital to give blood and is asked what type she is. She tells them she’s an outgoing cat-lover.