Why do blondes like blonde jokes? 'Cause they make them feel famous!
While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not. I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?" The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."
Chuck Norris stuffs lockers into bullies!
How many blondes does it take to play tag? One.
Three women were sitting in a bar, (a brunette, red head, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "well I was on top when I conceived so I will have a boy". The red head said, "If that is true then I will have a girl because I was on the bottom when I conceived. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
Q. Why can't a blonde get a drivers license? A. Because every time the instructor says "Let's park" she jumps in the back seat.
What would you do if a Blonde threw a hand grenade right at you? "Just pull the pin and throw it back."
Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around!
Doctor: "Yes, what is it I can do for you?" Blond: "Doctor, yesterday, when I was doing my yoga, one of my friends told me that if I did this particular exercise, all my body’s blood would go into my head. But, when I stand, why doesn’t anyone say that all the blood would go into the legs?" Doctor: "The fact’s your legs are not that hollow as your head is."
Slut - "I hate you bitch" Blonde - "Your such a slut, I bet your naked under those clothes."
What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes? She sticks it in the microwave.