Q: Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?
A: Because they can divide sin and cosine to get a tan! 
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A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown.
She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep.
She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?"
The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?"
"Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car.
The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"
Q: What did one math book say to the other?
A: Don't bother me I've got my own problems!
One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, "Hey, Mommy! Mommy!
Today in school we learned to count.
The other kids could only count to three but I can count to Ten..... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!"
The mother responds, "Very good honey."
The blonde asks, "Is that because I'm a blonde mommy?"
And the mother responds, "Yes dear."
Next day the blonde came home and went to her mother and said, "Today in school we learned our ABCs!
The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! .... A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!"
The mother says, "Very good honey."
The blonde then asked.
"Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?"
The mother responds, "Yes dear."
The third day the blonde come home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy today in school we went swimming!
But I was the only one who had breasts.
Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?"
And the mother responds, "No Honey, it's because you're twenty five."
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
Vote:
Q:What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?
A:A high school math problem!
My math teacher called me average...
How mean!
Yo momma is so stupid when they asked her 1+1 she said "Ouch! it is a long story."
Teacher: "Are you good at math?"
Pupil: "Yes and no."
Teacher: "What do you mean?"
Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"
How I see math word problems:
If you have 4 pencils and 7 apples, how many pancakes will fit on the roof?
Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.