Joke #5050

A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices. The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain belonged to a NASA top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a policeman's brain as well. It costs $50,000." The client asked, "What? How's that possible?" The doctor replied, "You see, it's totally unused."
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: cop

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Driving to work, a gentlman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in the road. The policmen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain large upholstery tacks. "I'm sorry sir," the first trooper told the driver, "but I am still going to have to write you a ticket." Amazed, the driver asked for what. The trooper replied, "Tacks evasion."
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: cop
A man calls into the police station and says, "My wife is missing." The officer asks, "How long has she been gone?" "A month." "Why did you wait so long to report it?" "Well, until yesterday I thought it was just a dream, then I realized I didn’t have any clean clothes to wear."
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has 46.76 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: cop, marriage, wife
A cop once pulled Chuck Norris over...Luckily, the cop left only with a warning.
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Yo' Mama is so stupid, when she was pulled over for drunk driving and asked to walk a line, she said, "Which one?"
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, drunk, stupid, Yo mama
Two thieves each sneak into a rich man's party. During dinner the thieves marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and both decided they would try to steal some. The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime. After dinner, the second thief comes up with a way to steal a golden spoon without suspicion being placed on him. He picks up a golden spoon identical to the first and holds it up in front of the party-goers explaining he wishes to show them a magic trick. "And now..." he speaks to the crowd and points towards the first thief, "I will put this spoon into my pocket, and remove it from this gentleman here's own pocket!"
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has 74.94 % from 146 votes. More jokes about: cop, food, money
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she called the police to report a suspicious looking person lurking in her mirror.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: cop, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
A lady who was speeding had an officer pulled her to the side of the road.   She didn't have her seat belt on so as soon as she stopped, she quickly slipped it on before the officer got to her window. After talking to her about speeding, the officer said, "I see you are wearing your seat belt. Do you believe in wearing it at all times?" "Yes, I do, officer," she replied. "Well," asked the officer, "do you always do it up with it looped through your steering wheel?"
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has 75.27 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, women
Q: What do you call a violent minority? A: A thug. Q: What do you call a violent white guy? A: Officer.
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has 70.26 % from 945 votes. More jokes about: cop, racist, white people
When President Roosevelt dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima, he did so only because it was more human then sending Chuck Norris.
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has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: cop
There were three guys manhers, shaup and shed. They went for a drive, shed wanted to go to the store to pick up snacks for the ride. So shed went in the store. Twenty minutes passes they were getting impatient so manhers went in what's taking him so long. Minutes later a police officer went to him and asked his name he replied "shaup!" Police officer was startled what he said. Police said "where's your manners boy!". Shaup replied to the officer "he's inside picking up shed*
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: cop, food, time, travel