What do you call a baby on a stick?
A Kebabie.
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What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common?
Their last big hit was The Wall.
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Steve lies dying, as Jack, his law partner of 40 years, sits at his bedside.
"Jack, I've got to confess -- I've been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I'm the father of your daughter, and I've been stealing from the firm for a decade."
"Relax," says Jack, "and don't think another thing about it. I'm the one who put arsenic in your martini."
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A daughter wakes up at 3 a.m. and asks her mother:
"Mummy, tell me a fairy-tale."
"Daddy will get back soon and he will tell both of us a fairy tale..."
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Q: What do you tell someone you didn't see at New Year's Eve?
A: I haven't seen you for a year!
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Q: What does FUBU really stand for?
A: Farmers used to buy us.
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Someone going to work sees a crowd of people walking.
Looking at the beginning of course, he sees a coffin behind a gentleman with a little dog followed by the crowd.
Approaching the owner and he asks him:
"What happened here, man?"
"Pff, my mother-in-law died," he said.
"Hush how sad eh… And, if allowed, how?"
"My dog bit her…"
"You don't tell me! Could you lend him to me just for tonight?"
"Get in line!"
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Q: What did the cannibal do once he dumped his lady friend?
A: He wiped his bottom.
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Why did Beyonce sing 'to the left', 'to the left'?
Because black people have no rights...
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A Mexican and a nigga are riding in car.
Who's driving?
A cop!
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Jerry was in the hospital recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.
“I’m OK but I didn’t like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery,” he answered.
“What did he say?,” asked the nurse.
“OOPS!”
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