What do you call a baby on a stick?
A Kebabie.
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Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore.
So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
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I love blacks. It's a pitty they are not being traded anymore...
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A businessman was flying on a plane surrounded by hundreds of kids.
A lady went and sat down next to him.
She asked, "Are these all your kids?"
The man replied, "No, I just work at a condom factory, these are all the complaints".
Do you remember how everyone was trying to kill Osama Bin Laden?
Well, since all of our presidents seem to get shot, why we just didn't make Bin Laden president.
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First Cannibal: "Who was that girl I saw you with last night?"
Second Cannibal: "That was no girl, that was my supper."
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A few days after her husband's death, a grieving widow accidentally receives an e-mail from a man waiting for his wife in Miami.
The e-mail reads:
Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in.
Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.
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Q: What did one casket say to the sick casket?
A: Is that you coughin'?
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Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL?
A: Sir, we were able to save her!
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An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time.
"I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."
"That's wonderful," the artist exclaimed. "What's the bad news?"
"The guy was your doctor..."
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What's funnier than cancer?
Most things, really.
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