Joke #1121

Q: What did one casket say to the sick casket? A: Is that you coughin'?
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A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear. No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?" The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler." "I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker on the windshield." The general said, "Drive on!" The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker." The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!" The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"
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What do you call a virgin on a waterbed? A cherry float.
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Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine. I guess that was why several of us died of tuberculosis.
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Q: What happened to Jesus when he said "Catch me outside, how bout dat"? A: He got crucified
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I gas the only problem I have with the wold now is all the deutchbags.
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I wish I could see things from your point of view, unfortunately I can't stick my head that far up my ass.
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Q: What's blue and doesn't fit? A: A dead epileptic.
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Did you hear that Princess Di was on the radio a couple of weeks ago? Yep, and on the dashboard, and on the window, and on the hood....
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Hitler is daddy! Hump me! Fuck me! Daddy better gas them Jews. My gas chambers love the smoke. G-g-gas the Jews.
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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream. Q: How do you get them out? A: Chips.
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