Joke #5179

Q: What do you get when you cross a elephant with a witch? A: I don’t know but she will need a very large broom!
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A young man decided after 4 years of working nonstop at a decent paying job and saving the bulk of his earnings that perhaps it was time to settle down. He called up an old girlfriend from his high school days and she answered on the first ring. As they spoke and reminisced about old times she said to him "Wow, this has been great, I've really enjoyed speaking with you, but I must ask, where on earth did you find my number?" To which he replied "Honestly? I'm just as surprised as you are, I have been working as a jani tor in our old high school and just happened to see your number etched into the door of a boys bathroom stall! I'm amazed you still have the same number after all these years!" And she responded "Well, how else was I supposed to keep in touch with all the boys I used to sleep with?"
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why don't witches wear panties when flying on their broomsticks? A: Better traction.
Vote: has 69.85 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

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I see you ordered the most expensive item on the menu for our first date. I hope you realize that it comes with a side order of my dick.
Vote: has 62.04 % from 100 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do you call nuts on a wall? A: Wallnuts Q: What do you call nuts on your chest? A: Chest nuts Q: What do you call nuts on your chin? A: A penis in your mouth
Vote: has 59.95 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

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What type of pussy does a priest get? Nun.
Vote: has 80.82 % from 234 votes. Send joke:

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Man comes home to find his 17 yr old daughter with a d*ldo up her. "What are you doing," he shouts. "Well you won't let me have a boyfriend so this is my substitute," she explains. The next night the daughter comes home to find her dad with a d*ldo up his arse drinking a can of beer, "What are you doing," she shouts. He replays, "Having a beer with your boyfriend."
Vote: has 76.26 % from 111 votes. Send joke:

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Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
Vote: has 65.83 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

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If one drop of semen contains more life than a drop of blood, why don't vampires suck cock? Oh wait... Twilight
Vote: has 82.08 % from 707 votes. Send joke:

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How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head.
Vote: has 21.61 % from 67 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, black humor, dirty