Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: Because you can see right through them!
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds. An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it's the only love they get.
The reason why women will never be the ones who propose is that as soon as they get on their knees, man starts unzipping.
Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"
Black humour is like a pair of legs. Not everyone has it.
Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients? They hid their own eggs!
What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was The Wall.
Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream. Q: How do you get them out? A: Chips.
Girl: "Do you believe in puppy love?" Boy: "I tried it once, but their assholes are too small."
What do you call a baby on a stick? A Kebabie.