Joke #5484

...and then the devil said, "Let's put the alphabet into mathematics."
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has 64.93 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: math

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A somewhat advanced society has figured out how to package basic knowledge in pill form. A student, needing some learning, goes to the pharmacy and asks what kind of knowledge pills are available. The pharmacist says: "Here's a pill for English literature." The student takes the pill and swallows it and has new knowledge about English literature. "What else do you have?" asks the student. "Well I have pills for art history, biology, and world history," replies the pharmacist. The student asks for these, and swallows them and has new knowledge about those subjects. Then the student asks: "Do you have a pill for math?" The pharmacist says, "Wait just a moment," goes back to the storeroom, brings back a whopper of a pill, and plonks it on the counter. "I have to take that huge pill for math?" inquires the student. The pharmacist replies, "Well you know math always was a little hard to swallow."
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has 62.08 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: history, math, school
Do you like maths? If so add a bed subtract your clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
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has 56.83 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: flirt, geek, math, sex
The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
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has 25.30 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, math
Chuck Norris teaches math to solve its own problems.
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has 70.84 % from 368 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math, teacher
Chuck Norris does infinit loops in 4 seconds.
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has 22.82 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math, time
"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
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has 61.75 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: math, phone, relationship, student
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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has 52.12 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Two statisticians go bird hunting. The first one fires at the bird but overshoots by 5 feet. The second one fires and undershoots the bird by 5 feet. They both give each other a high-five and say "Got it!"
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has 68.56 % from 217 votes. More jokes about: math
DEPT OF STATISTICS: All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve. DEPT OF PSYCHOLOGY: Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind. DEPT OF HISTORY: All students get the same grade they got last year. DEPT OF RELIGION: Grade is determined by God. DEPT OF PHILOSOPHY: What is a grade? LAW SCHOOL: Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A. DEPT OF MATHEMATICS: Grades are variable. DEPT OF LOGIC: If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A else the student will not receive an A. DEPT OF COMPUTER SCIENCE: Random number generator determines grade. MUSIC DEPARTMENT: Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note (+ and - would be sharp and flat respectively). DEPT OF PHYSICAL EDUCATION: Everybody gets an A.
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has 55.90 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: history, math, religious, school
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
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has 36.81 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, math, science