Joke #5520

Q: What do Barbie and Paris Hilton have in common? A: Both are blonde, brainless and made out of plastic.
Vote:
has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis." The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
Vote:
has 74.83 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: blonde, doctor, medical, stupid
Three women were sitting in a bar, (a brunette, red head, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "well I was on top when I conceived so I will have a boy". The red head said, "If that is true then I will have a girl because I was on the bottom when I conceived. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
Vote:
has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, blonde, ginger, women
A blonde's house is on fire. She runs outside and yells, "Help me! My house is on fire! What do I do?!" Someone else yells, "Call 911!" The blonde yells back, "What's the number?"
Vote:
has 73.56 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: blonde, phone, stupid
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!", the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
Vote:
has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop
A blonde was having sharp pains in her side. The doctor examined her and said, "You have acute appendicitis." The blond yelled at the doctor... "A cute appendicitis! I came here to get medical help, not get a stupid compliment!"
Vote:
has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: blonde, doctor, medical, stupid
After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse. He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left. He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life. Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"
Vote:
has 61.68 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, disgusting, life, money
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
Vote:
has 85.57 % from 1441 votes. More jokes about: blonde, doctor, health
Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.
Vote:
has 56.46 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: blonde, light bulb, stupid
A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn't find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car. "235,000 miles." Her friend told her that was the problem. But the blonde's friend told her that her brother is a mechanic and could put back the miles to whatever she wanted. So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to put the miles at 40,000. Two days later the blond's friend asked her if she sold the car since her brother dropped the miles. The blonde told her, "Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!"
Vote:
has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, stupid
Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists? A: The rest are hunting peckers.
Vote:
has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: blonde, hunting