Why does a blonde put perfume on her ankles?
Because it ends up behind her ears anyway!
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What do you see when you look into a blonde’s eyes?
The back of her head.
A German woman is walking down the street.
Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her.
She screams, "Nein!, Nein"
So two guys walk away.
What's a difference between a blond and a mosquito?
once you smack a mosquito it stops sucking
How does a blonde turn on the light after sex?
She opens the car door.
Doctor: "You look exhausted."
Blond: "I am. When your nurse phoned me yesterday and told me that I have to come today for a blood test, I spent the whole night studying for it."
Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed?
She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
Blonde: "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me."
Psychiatrist: "Don't you have a cell phone?"
Blonde: "They're too expensive, so I did the next best thing: I put a mailbox in my car."
Psychiatrist: "And do you receive any letters?"
Blonde: "No, but I figure it's because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps changing."
What is the difference between a blonde and a pothole?
You swerve to miss a pothole!
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!", the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"