A blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.
She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes, but didn't want to pay the high prices.
After unsuccessfully haggling with of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde said, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price."
Later in the day, the shopkeeper spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand.
She took aim at an alligator, killed it and hauled it onto the swamp bank.
Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.
The shopkeeper watched in amazement as the blonde flipped the alligator on its back and shouted in frustration, "Damn, this one isn't wearing any shoes either."
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Q. Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A. Because she blows the horn!
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
I wonder if it's mine.
Q: Why was the blonde jogging backwards?
A: She wanted to gain weight!
The blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant.
The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have.
Unfazed, the blonde assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more.
"I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."
"But I always get it here," says the blonde.
"Do you have the container it comes in?"
"Yes!" says the blonde, "I will go and get it."
She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."
The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: "To apply, push up bottom."
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a deserted island together.
The island is 20 miles from the nearest inhabited island so they all decide to try to swim there.
The redhead makes it 10 miles, is exhausted, gives up, and drowns.
The brunette makes it 15 miles before she's too tired to go any farther and drowns.
The blonde gets 19 miles away from the deserted island, decides she's too tired to go any farther, and swims all the way back to the deserted island.
Vote:
Doctor: "You look exhausted."
Blond: "I am. When your nurse phoned me yesterday and told me that I have to come today for a blood test, I spent the whole night studying for it."
What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A blonde parade.
Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around!
A man works in the operations department of a large bank.
Employees call him from the field when they have problems with their computers.
One night a blonde woman from a branch bank called him and said, "I've got smoke coming from the back of my computer terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"