Why do women need guys? Vibrators don’t usually pay for drinks.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? "We better get some support before someone thinks we're nuts!"
Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
The woman was in bed with her lover and had just told him how stupid her Irish husband was when the door was thrown open and there stood her husband. He glared at her lover and bellowed, "What are you doing?" "There," said the wife, "didn’t I tell you he was stupid?"
An evening of Valentine's Day. A man comes to a drug store: "Good evening!" "Sorry, we are sold out..."
Did you hear about the new contraceptive pill for men? You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.
Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost over $1.2 million. The study concluded that the reason the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft was to provide the man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, France decided to conduct their own study on the same subject. They were convinced that the results of the British study was incorrect. After three years of research at a cost of in excess of $2 million, the French researchers concluded that the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more pleasure during sex. When the results of the French study were released, Canada decided to conduct their own study. The Canucks didn't really trust British or French studies. So, after nearly three weeks of intensive research and a cost of right around $75.00, the Canadian study was complete. They concluded that the reason the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent your hand from flying off and hitting you in the forehead!
If you're under the age of 25 and you think your life sucks then you better brace yourself.... Life has only given you the TIP of its Dildo.
What do a gynecologist, and a pizza delivery guy have in common? They both can smell it, but they can't eat it!
Men, don’t buy expensive ‘ribbed’ condoms; buy an ordinary one and slip in a handful of frozen peas.
Q: Why do blondes need to have orgasms? A: So they know when to stop having sex.