Joke #5743

"Mommie, Mommie....did you know that nurses can come apart..?" "Well...no. What makes you say that..?" "Because the other night, I overheard Daddy say that he screwed the ass off of a nurse..!"
Vote: has 82.89 % from 190 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A Russian guy comes across a bottle of vodka on the street. He picks it up and a genie comes out, "You are my master. You now have one wish." The Russian man says, "I would like to piss vodka." When the he gets home, he tells his wife to get two glasses. She asks what they'll be drinking. He tells her he can piss vodka and demonstrates for her. It was the best vodka they'd ever had. The next night the Russian guy comes home tired and tells his wife to get one glass. She asks, "Why only one glass?" "Because tonight," he says, "you should drink from the bottle."
Vote: has 52.05 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, wife
Q: Why don't witches wear underwear? A: For a better grip on there broomstick!
Vote: has 59.79 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
A handsome young lad went into the hospital for some minor surgery, and the day after the procedure a friend stopped by to see how the guy was doing. His friend was amazed at the number of nurses who entered the room in short intervals with refreshments, offers to fluff his pillows, make the bed, give back rubs, etc. "Why all the attention?" the friend asked, "You look fine to me." "I know!" grinned the patient. "But the nurses kind of formed a little fan club when they all heard that my circumcision required twenty-seven stitches."
Vote: has 70.72 % from 73 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, hospital, nurse
Your house is so dirty I saw rats on dirt bikes.
Vote: has 23.02 % from 89 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dirty
Yo mama ass so big your dad's dick gets lost in it.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, fat, sex, Yo mama
When Viagra first came out my wife and I decided to give it a go to see what all the fuss was about. I popped the pill and waited the 15 minutes and then it was on for young and old. We timed the performance to the minute and it all finally subsided at 3 hours and 17 minutes. I asked the missus what she thought and she simply stated that she couldn't understand what all the hype was about for an extra 17 minutes...
Vote: has 56.50 % from 42 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, sex, time, viagra, wife
The manager hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. While leaving the room, she courteously said, “Oh, sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?” He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his new employee. Calling her in, he asked, “By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you also see a soldier standing at attention?” The secretary, who was quite witty, replied, “Why, no sir. all I saw was a little, disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!”
Vote: has 84.37 % from 431 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie - I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
Vote: has 48.79 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, flirt, food, sex
One day a tiny Apache indian child walked into Big Chief Sitting Bull's Teepee. "Sitting Bull," He asked, "Why does every man in our tribe have such long, complicated names?" "Well," says Sitting Bull, "Its simple.Whenever a baby in this tribe is born, His Father wanders outside, absorbs the wonder of nature and then names his child on the first thing he sees. Why do you ask, Two dogs fucking?"
Vote: has 83.83 % from 511 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
North America, few hundred years ago. An indian is sitting, smokes a pipe. Breathes in, breathes out. His son comes up to him: Daddy, I have a question Well, what is it? Why do we have such long names? Yankees, for example, have much shorter ones - John, Simon, Nicolas and similar. Our names come from nature. When your mother was born, there was a wonderful dew, so that is why she is called Fresh Dew. When your sister was born, there was a brilliant sunset. So that why she got the name Red Sunset. So, do you have any more questions, Fucking Bison?
Vote: has 44.49 % from 48 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty