What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? I wonder if it's mine.
A road construction manager needed to hire someone to paint the yellow lines down the middle of a newly constructed road. A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all get hired. They are each assigned a section of the road. The first day, the blonde paints 2 miles, the redhead 1.5, and the brunette only 1. On the second day, the blonde paints 1 mile, the brunette 2, and the redheaed 2.5. On the third day, the blonde only gets 1/4 of a mile done, the redheaed 3, and the brunette 3.5. The manager decides to talk to the blonde. "You haven't been painting as much road as you did on the first day," the manager said. "What's the problem?" "I'd be painting more, but the bucket keeps getting farther and farther away!"
I'm a blonde! I'm a blonde, yay! B-L-O...? I'm a blonde, yay!
Did you hear about the blonde that stayed up all night to see where the sun went? It finally dawned on her.
Q: What do you call a blonde sitting in the back of your 6th grade class? A: your 25 year old mom.
Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
A blonde is driving a helicopter and it crashes. When the police come and ask the blond what happened she says, "I got cold so I turned off the big fan!"
Q: Why do blondes smile when there's lightning? A: Because they think they're getting their picture taken!
What is the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde? "There have actually been sightings of Bigfoot."
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted!
After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse. He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left. He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life. Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"