There were these two guys working late in a morgue, when one guy said, “Hey man there is a woman in there with a shrimp in her vagina!”
The other asked, “What is a shrimp doing a dead woman's vagina? Let me go see.”
Both of them went in the room with the woman, and they both curiosly looked.
Finally, the second man said, “You idiot, this ain't no shrimp it's a clitoris.”
And the other man replied, “Well, it tasted like shrimp to me.”
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Q: When does a cub become a boy scout?
A: When he eats his first Brownie.
Remember my name, because you'll be screaming it later!
Monica is at the dentist.
Half of her mouth is locked due to anesthesia, the dentist is intensively working.
Monica's mobile phone starts ringing.
Ignoring it four times, the dentist finally answers the phone pissed:
What’s up?
What’s up?, - some man asks.
Dentist:
Who are you?
I’m Monica’s husband
Dentist:
Listen, man, I’m about to finish, she will spit it out and will call you back!!!
Q: What's the difference between jelly and jam?
A: I can't jelly my dick a baby's throat.
Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
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Me: What's that hunny?
Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk.
Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
What's the only thing white girls swallow?
Starbucks.
Q: Why don't witches wear underwear?
A: For a better grip on there broomstick!
Q: If a horses foot covers 2 acres of land, what will his tail cover?
A: His ass!