She was so blonde that she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
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Q: How do you know a blonde's having a bad day?
A: Her tampon's behind her ear and she can't find her pencil...
Q: What do blondes and railroad tracks have in common?
A: They've both been laid all over America.
What can save a dying blonde?
Hair transplants.
A blonde and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blonde asked the brunette what she was going to buy.
The brunette replied, "I think I'll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?"
The blonde said, "I think I'm gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it."
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.
"We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder.
" The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down.
Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement and announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.
Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!"
Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven?
A: She didn't know what one came first.
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
A. Locking the car door.
A blonde goes to the doctor with both of her ears and her right hand are burned.
"Sit down and tell me how it happened," says the doctor.
"I was ironing my clothes when I received a call. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and burned my ear."
"What about the other ear and your hand?"
"I tried to call for an ambulance."
Q: Why did the blonde fail her drivers liscence?
A: She wasn't used to the front seat!