Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds.
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Similar jokes
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How can you help a starving cannibal?
Give him a helping hand.
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Guy having sex says "damn bitch, there should be a law against sex this good."
To which the girl replies "I think there is daddy..."
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My wife and I have reached a decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
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Q: What's the difference between Auschwitz and Sarajevo?
A: At least they had gas in Auschwitz.
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Use to be we had Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Steven Jobs.
Now we have no hope, no cash, and no jobs.
Please do not die Kevin Bacon.
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Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty five-year-olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them!
Sylvester Stallone's son was found dead.
I guess we have a good plot for the next Rambo movie now.
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Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
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So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob.
"Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work."
"Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday."
So I call him on his cell.
"What gives, bro,?" I ask.
"Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes."
I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer."
"Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."
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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?
A: A pedophile.
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