Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds.
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Similar jokes
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Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
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What's the difference between a police officer and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone else, you know it's been fired.
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A guy asks his waiter at a restaurant how they prepare their chicken.
The waiter goes blank for a second, then says, "Nothing special really... We just tell them they're going to die..."
Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?
"Ask your sister"
"I don't have a..."
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Did you hear about the black guy that died on the highway?
He stuck his head out the window and his lips beat him to death.
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Good news, I've been given a goldfish for my birthday...
The bad news is that I don't get the bowl until my next birthday!
In order to help jump-start the U.S. economy, the INS has announced that this year they will stop focusing on illegal aliens, and begin the deportation of retired people.
It's predicted that this will not only help lower health care entitlement costs, but it turns out that retirees are much easier to catch.
Plus, they rarely can remember how to get back home.
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Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him:
"Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of $100,000, and you gave her $50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?"
Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? $50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
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What's the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?
The dashboard.
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Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire?
Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.
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