What do you call of 6 year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
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Similar jokes
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What's red and crawls up your leg?
A homesick miscarriage.
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Q: What's the best part about sex with 28-year-olds?
A: There are twenty of them.
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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.
Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
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How are babies and the elderly alike?
Both are fun to throw out of moving cars.
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Doctor to patient: "Why are you nervous?"
Patient: "Because this is the first item I am going to have An operation."
Doctor: "But I am not nervous though this is going to be my first operation."
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At the doctors office:
Doc: "Unfortunately sir, you have only 1 week to live…"
Man: "Doctor what on earth are you saying?”, clearly chocked, “Tell me what can I do to live at least a little linger, please…"
Doc: "Do you eat fried food?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ill do it"
Doc: "Do you eat fat food?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ok doc"
Doc: "Do you stay up late?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ok"
Doc: "Do you have sex often?"
Man: "Yes!
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… I’ll do that too"
Doc: "Do you smoke?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… I will"
Doc: "Do you drink?"
Man: "Yes..."
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "OK doctor, but you didn’t tell me, if I do all the things you told me, how longer will I live?"
Doc: "You will still live for a week… but it will seem like a century…"
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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.
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What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A cherry float.
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Funeral jokes are the best - they never die...
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