Joke #5999

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. "I've figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always lose control at the same point in every game." "When is that?" "Right after the National Anthem."

Yo' Mama is like a heavyweight boxer: a few licks, a few blows, and she's back to her corner.

Why are black people so good at Basketball? Cause all you have to do is RUN, SHOOT and STEAL.

Chuck Norris once ran in a movie marathon.... and won.

What games do ants play with elephants? Squash!

Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics? He had it bronzed.

A drunk guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing. He starts sawing a hole in the ice, when a loud booming voice says, "You will find no fish there." The drunk looks up, ignores it, and continues on. The voice booms again, "You will find no fish under the ice." The drunk looks up and says, "God, is that you?" The voice says, "No, I'm the manager of this ice rink."

Zeke: Why were the swimming elephants thrown out of the Olympics? Kyle: I haven't a clue. Zeke: Because they couldn't keep their trunks up!

Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married? A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.