Q: What happens when you feed gun powder to a chicken? A: Egg-splosion
What are Women Really Thinking? So many men, so few who can afford me. Coffee, chocolate, men ... some things are just better rich. Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen. Guys have feelings too, But ... who cares? And your point is? Next mood swing: 6 minutes. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library." So the blonde whispers, "Oh sorry! can I have a diet coke then?"
What did one dairy cow say to another? Got milk?
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Zero.
My girl caught me blowing my dick with the air dryer, and asked what I was doing? Apparently "heating your dinner" wasn't a good answer.
Why does a chicken lay eggs? Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
Q: What's the difference between a cook and a gay? A: The cook stirs today's lunch, whereas the gay stirs yesterday's dinner.
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she uses bacon as bandages.
Chuck Norris boils an egg by holding it.