Joke #6671

Q: What happens when you feed gun powder to a chicken? A: Egg-splosion

First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."

On his Birthday, a man named Peter was really upset because none of his family members or near and dear ones wished him. As he walked into his office, his secretary Anna said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!" He felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered. In the lunch time Anna knocked on his door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your Birthday, why don't we go out for lunch, just you and me." Peter happily agreed They had their lunch but on the way back to the office, Anna said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day... We don't have to go right back to the office, do we?" Peter replied "I suppose not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment, it's just around the corner." After arriving at her apartment, Anna said, "Boss if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back." "Ok." He nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes; she came out carrying a huge birthday cake... Followed by his wife, his kids, and dozens of his friends, and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday". And Peter just sat there... On the couch... Naked!

Chuck Norris eats granite and drinks lava for his lunch.

It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds. An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.

Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!” The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

What does an annoying pepper do? It get's jalapeño face

Your theeth are so yellow when you opend the popcorn packet it said "We are family."

Yo' Mama is like a bag of chips: Fri-to-lay.

Knock knock! Who's there? Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream land on you!

How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed? You can smell the carrots on his breath.