Joke #6754

Q: What do you call a blonde doing a handstand? A: A brunette with bad breath.
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has 37.45 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Teacher: And therefore, sperm cells are made up of glucose. Student: So you're saying that sperm has sugar in it? Teacher: Technically. Yes. Student: But it doesn't even taste like that... Teacher: what? Student: what?
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has 82.93 % from 1265 votes. More jokes about: dirty, student, teacher
I'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
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has 61.36 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex, work
Had a fight with an erection this morning. I beat it single handedly.
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has 84.23 % from 696 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A young punk gets on the cross-town bus. He's got spiked, multi-colored hair that's green, purple, and orange. His clothes are a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he's wearing worn-out shoes. His entire face and body are riddled with pierced jewelry and his earrings are big, bright feathers. He sits down in the only vacant seat that's directly across from an old man who glares at him for the next ten miles. Finally, the punk gets self-conscious and barks at the old man, "What are you looking at you old fart... didn't you ever do anything wild when you were young?" Without missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah, back when I was young and in the Navy, I got really drunk one night in Singapore and screwed a parrot.... I thought maybe you were my son.''
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has 80.97 % from 945 votes. More jokes about: dirty, drunk, fart, parrot, travel
Three men were caught for murder on same day. Very next day they were produced in the court. After hearing all the arguments the judge decided to declare the verdict after lunch. It happened to be his wife's birthday that day and he had promised to not give death penalty on her birthday to anyone. After lunch judge announced that all the three accused will receive 500 lashes. Since it's almost a death penalty all accused were asked for their last wish. First one thought as nothing can save him now, wishes for noth ing. He is lashed 500 times all over his body. He was bleeding all over gasping for final breath and conciousness. When second person was asked for his wish he thought for a moment and said, "I wish that 10 pillow is tied all over me." Well, 500 lashes was given but he laughed all over as pillow absorbed all the forces of lashes. Now, The third person was called and asked for his wish. He looked around. He saw first person facing his death and counting his last breath and second person laughing at first person calling him idiot. He took some time and with deep breath said,"Tie second person over me. "
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has 71.62 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty, prison, time, wife
On Sunday little Johnny with his dad went for bathing. The ground was slippery. So poor boy for avoiding of knocking down grabbed his father's penis. His father smiled and told him: "Oh boy you are lucky. If you were with your mother you were concussion!"
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has 56.59 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty, health, little Johnny, women
Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.
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has 37.83 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dirty, kids, sex
One day President Trump's motorcade was heading to the Mexican border to see first hand progress on The Wall. All of a sudden a naked lone figure was seen bent over on the side of the road. Wanting to help the president ordered the motorcade to stop. He got out and approached the figure and suddenly realized it was Nancy Pelosi. She was naked with her wrists handcuffed to her ankles. The president said, "OMG Nancy what happened?" She cried out that she was kidnapped by a bunch of people wearing MAGA hats and left to die! The president said "Well I'm not going to let that happen" as he was unzipping his zipper. He yelled out to the motorcade "OK boys the line starts behind me"
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has 25.32 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, dirty, mexican, political
How can you tell a tough lesbian bar? Even the pool table has no balls.
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has 68.17 % from 533 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, lesbian
There are a hundred holes in the body of a woman; one of them would be filled with a penis and 99 others could be filled with money.
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has 47.87 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, money, sex, women